Wow I said it....

OK so I guess the events going on in my head from a issue I had at work (this started on 1/15) were completely untrue, but according to my boss I took the comments the wrong way. I guess maybe I did but the comments made were hurtful and I felt like I was being undermined. Not to mention my one co-worker who can make my day go sour in 1 minute flat, the combo of those two events slowly happening just made me go into a depressed state of mind for a week. I checked out mentally.....I needed that.

My boss called me yesterday, I ignored her phone call, listened to her super nice voicemail then panicked a little.

My boss called me today at 11:30am, I ignored that phone call, listened to her now concerned voicemail, then again panicked a little.

I typed a letter, addressed it to my boss and dropped it off on the front porch of my old work.

I texted to my boss hoping she accepted text messages. This was our conversation before I mustered up the guts to talk with her one the phone.

Me: I dropped of a letter for you at the house
Boss: When?
Me: Today, from what T & D were saying I figured I was fired anyway
Boss: Not at all. Would really like to talk with you and figure out what's going on.
Me: I would like to talk too but I'm embarrassed and I know my 'no show' are unlike my inner character. Which makes me feel worse, I have a hard time in these situations. I'm sorry boss
Boss: Well I think your a valuable employee and are really good with our folks. Really don't want to lose you. Have you talked with T & D?....We are clueless!
Me: I just don't think I can hack it Boss, the consumers are awesome and most of my co-workers rock but I guess I just shut down after a few comments that were made
Boss:What was said?! Like I said we're clueless!
Me: I'll call you, but beware my 3 year old is with me
Boss: That's OK, I used to have one of those!

I called my Boss and explained the many comments and situations, my boss explained to me that I need to let her know these things so she can help me instead of letting it get to me this bad. I can agree to that. She also said that the issues I've had she has also had way back in the day when she started with this company. It was nice to know that I wasn't the only one who's felt this before, it was nice to know that for once in my life my bipolar wasn't going to be an issue with this boss.

Then I dropped the bomb on her, I admitted to her that I am in fact an in recovery bi-polar person who is happy to work with others who are suffering from mental illness. She then told me that now days its been nice to see more people will their illnesses coming out, getting help and then helping others. I thought dropping that bomb on her would have made her fire me, I explained that I had went into a depressed state and I hadn't went into one of these in years. This is true, I hadn't felt that low of a depression in a few years.

So Mrs. Boss will be calling me here soon to let me know my schedule. Its nice to know I'm working for someone who understands mental illness, I know if this was a different company in the same situation I would be in the unemployment line.